Introduction
Although marriage is a great blessing, it also requires great effort. The things we have to do to give and receive that blessing do not all come naturally, particularly for guys. In fact, some are contrary to what we tend to in our own nature. But we give and receive great blessing if we overcome our natural inclinations and do those things.
So what are those things? Scripture gives us important guidance about what is expected of husbands. Are they always easy? No, but marriage is like anything else in life—you get out of it what you put into it. Moreover, God will supplement your sincere effort with His graces.
Five of those scriptures are arranged here in the form of a rosary-based prayer. Each of the key passages are set out as a “Marital Mystery” where a glorious, luminous, joyous or sorrowful mystery would be in a traditional rosary. Each Marital Mystery is followed by definitions of the key verbs in the passage or something else to meditate on in connection with that scripture.
Things in green text are things scripture tells us to do. Things in red text are things that scripture tells us not to do. There are bolded hyperlinks (sometimes in green or red) to different translations of the scriptures, to definitions of key Greek and Hebrew terms within those scriptures, and to the text of the standard prayers.
One final note, additional scriptures and principles about being a good husband are collected/discussed at What Scripture Says About Being a Good Husband and Scriptural directions for husbands—collected
First Marital Mystery:
How does Christ love the church?
- He is patient with us
- He reassures when doubt arises
- Through the scriptures
- Through recollection of past successes/faithfulness
- He is subtle
- He frees up time/relieves other pressures so we can attend to what He wants us to do
- He provides the resources we need to do what He is calling us to
- He is persistent, He perseveres
- He intercedes for us
- He does practical acts of service
- He is energetic, He does not let fatigue get in the way
to give over
to deliver one up
Second Marital Mystery:
In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29For no one ever hates his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ does for the church.
an exercise of … will in deliberate choice
is not an impulse from the feelings, it does not always run with the natural inclinations, nor does it spend itself only upon those for whom some affinity is discovered.
seeks the welfare of
works no ill to
seeks opportunity to do good
the deep and constant … interest of a perfect Being towards entirely unworthy objects
wish well to, regard the welfare of
to take pleasure in the thing, prize it above other things, be unwilling to abandon it or do without it
to welcome with desire, long for
to nurture, rear
to rear up to maturity
to cherish or train
to keep warm, as of birds covering their young with their feathers
to foster with tender care
to cherish with tender love
malicious and unjustifiable feelings towards
animosity
feeling of aversion
disregard for
detest
to love less
postpone in love or esteem, to slight
disregard and indifference to a thing
Third Marital Mystery:
an exercise of … will in deliberate choice
is not an impulse from the feelings, it does not always run with the natural inclinations, nor does it spend itself only upon those for whom some affinity is discovered.
seeks the welfare of
works no ill to
seeks opportunity to do good
the deep and constant … interest of a perfect Being towards entirely unworthy objects
wish well to, regard the welfare of
to take pleasure in the thing, prize it above other things, be unwilling to abandon it or do without it
to welcome with desire, long for
to embitter
Exasperate
render angry, indignant
irritated
Fourth Marital Mystery:
Husbands, in the same way, show consideration for your wives in your life together, paying honor to the woman as the weaker sex since they too are also heirs of the gracious gift of life—so that nothing may hinder your prayers.
primarily "a seeking to know, an enquiry, investigation" ... denotes, in the NT, "knowledge," general intelligence, understanding moral wisdom, such as is seen in right living
intelligence, understanding
Valuing
the honor which one has by reason of rank and state of office which he holds
thing prized
honor which belongs or is shown to one: the honor of one who outranks others
pre-eminence
veneration
preciousness
value
Fifth Marital Mystery:
Rejoice with the wife of thy youth. 19Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
be glad
gladden, make glad
brighten up
cheer up
human love for human object
of man toward himself
between man and woman
sexual desire
Of God towards Israel
Of friends towards each other
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