Scriptural directions for husbands, annotated—Malachi 2:14-16

This translation is from the New American Standard Bible.  Several other translations are available here.

 

Excerpts from definitions of what seem to be key the Hebrew words are set out following the scriptural text. The sources are hyperlinked.

 

That is followed by excerpts from the scriptural texts that tell us what about God or His ways, what we should do, and what we should not do. 

 

That is followed by commentary, in blue. The commentary is my own, so it is not entitled to any particular weight.

 

Scriptural Text:

Malachi 2:14-16  

... the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. ¹⁵But not one has done so who has a remnant of the spirit. And what did that one do while he was seeking a godly offspring? Take heed then to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth. ¹⁶For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.” 

 

Definitions:

dealt treacherously, deal treacherously = בָּגַד= bagad

Blue Letter Bible

Deceitfully; faithlessly, offend; to act covertly; unfaithfully; fraudulently, perfidiously; to oppress, to afflict, to spoil

companion = חֲבֶרֶת= chabereth

Blue Letter Bible

wife, consort

take heed = שָׁמַר= shamar

Blue Letter Bible

to keep, guard, observe, give heed; to watch for, wait for; to keep, retain, treasure up (in memory); to keep (within bounds), restrain;to keep, preserve, protect; to hedge about (as with thorns), i.e. guard; generally, to protect, attend to, etc.;watch(-man); to take heed to one’s self.

 

spirit = רוּחַ = ruwach

Blue Letter Bible

wind, breath, mind, spirit; spirit, animation, vivacity, vigour; courage; vital spirit; as seat or organ of mental acts; as seat especially of moral character; Spirit of God, the third person of the triune God, the Holy Spirit, coequal, coeternal with the Father and the Son; divine and miraculous power

 

divorce = שָׁלַח= shalach

Blue Letter Bible

to send, send away, let go, stretch out; dismiss, give over, cast out; forsake; give up; push away, expel

 

his garment =לְבוּשׁ= lebuwsh

Blue Letter Bible  

clothing, garment, apparel, raiment; by implication (euphemistically) a wife

 

wrong = חָמָס= chamac

Blue Letter Bible

violence, wrong, cruelty, injustice; unjust gain; damage; unrighteous; false witness

 

 

What this passage tells us:

What this passage tells us about God/His ways:

she is your companion and your wife by covenant. 

 

What this passage tells us to do:

Take heed then to your spirit

take heed to your spirit

 

What this passage tells us not to do:

divorce

deal[] treacherously

let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth

him who covers his garment with wrong

do not deal treacherously

 

Commentary:

God is telling husbands to deal with their wives honestly, in good faith

·     To treat them as a peer, a lifelong companion.

·     To be true fiduciaries of them.

·     We are to be intentional about this, alert to what interferes with/deviates from that.

 

This lines up well with:

·     Ephesian's 5:29’s and Colossians 3:19’s instructions to avoid negative feelings/emotions/attitudes towards our wives.

·     1 Peter 3:17’s direction to have respect for our wives

 

This strong teaching against divorce lines up with Jesus’ and Paul’s teachings. See Matthew 5:31-32;  Matthew 19:3-9; 1 Corinthians 7:27 .

Scriptural directions for husbands, annotated—Matthew 5:31-32

This translation is from the New American Standard Bible.  Several other translations are available here.

 

Excerpts from definitions of what seem to be key the Greek words are set out following the scriptural text. The sources are hyperlinked.

 

That is followed by excerpts from the scriptural texts that tell us what about God or His ways, what we should do, and what we should not do. 

 

That is followed by commentary, in blue. The commentary is my own, so it is not entitled to any particular weight.

 

Scriptural Text:

Matthew 5:31-32  

“It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; ³²but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

 

Definitions:

divorce = ἀπολύω = apolyō  

Blue Letter Bible

to lose from, dismiss; to set free, release, loose; put away; to bid depart; to dismiss from the house, to repudiate; sever by loosening; undo

 

Henry George Liddell, Robert Scott, A Greek-English Lexicon

set free, release, relieve from; let go, let alone, leave one; discharge, disband; do away with, remove; do away with, refute calumnies against one; to be separated or detached

 

unchastity = πορνεία = porneia

Blue Letter Bible

illicit sexual intercourse;it stands for, or includes, adultery;adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.; sexual intercourse with close relatives;harlotry (including adultery and incest); figuratively, idolatry

 

 

What this passage tells us:

What this passage tells us not to do:

divorces his wife

marries a divorced woman 

 

Commentary:

This is consistent with other strong prohibitions of divorce. See Malachi 2:14-16; Matthew 19:3-9; 1 Corinthians 7:27.

 

This is a near absolute prohibition.

·     There is no exception for unpleasant, unrewarding, difficult, marriages

 

Christ never divorces himself from us, so if His relationship to us is the model for marriage as Ephesians 5:25 states, this prohibition makes sense.

·     To the extent that we divorce/separate ourselves from our spouses we are treating them more harshly than Christ treats us. That sounds a lot like asking to be forgiven when we will not forgive others.

 

One cannot cleanse/nourish his wife, as required by Ephesians 5:26-27, if he has separated himself from her.

 

This seems to be based on the impact divorce has on the divorced wife: it drives her into sin. It is therefore a humane measure. 

 

I wonder if this is motivated by a tough love/Hebrews 12 approach:

·     By forcing a husband to stay in the difficult marriage it forces him to address/work on what underlies the difficulty.

·     That is unpleasant while one is going through it, but is worth it in the end.

·     That therapeutic purpose is furthered by Malachi 2:14-16’s condemnation of duplicity/dishonesty; you can’t fix something unless you approach the matter honestly.  

 

So how do we cope with/heal a marriage that would tempt us to divorce? These vv. do not say, but perhaps other vv. in the overall passage (the sermon on the mount) do. In particular, Matthew 5:23-26 seems apt. It tells us to:

·     Make reconciliation of conflict a priority.

·     Initiate the process.

·     Not delay in addressing conflict; we should address the conflict before it festers.

·     Reconciliation should take priority over other very valid things.

 

Unchastity cuts both ways; if a wife’s unchastity justifies divorce, is the same true of a husband’s?

·      There is no logical reason why it shouldn’t.

·      A husband’s unchastity would have an equally deleterious effect on the marriage/wife.

·      And that would include such “soft” unchastity as pornography.

It is interesting to note that although unchastity justifies divorce, it does not require it.